Librarian Dress Up

Have you all seen this? This is my favorite combination so far.

I am thankful for...shushing

I wrote this song a while back, and have been saving it for a special occasion like THANKSGIVING! It was inspired by my first experience shushing a patron, a girl who was yakking away very loudly on her cellphone in the middle of the main floor of the library. I had to banish her to the foyer.

I used this "The Office" music video to help me write new lyrics for the song. Please imagine me dancing just like Michael Scott as you read.

Shushin' Back

I'm bringing shushin' back.
These little patrons don't know how to act.
I heard a ringtone, what's behind your back?
And none of that now while you're in the stacks.

Take it to the foyer.

[Bridge]
Chatty babe,
You see these glasses?
Baby, act your age.
You better watch it if you misbehave.
Library's not where you act this way.

Take it to the foyer.

[Chorus]
Come here, girl.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Come to the stacks.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
VIP.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Just like Dewey.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Let me see what you're shushin' with.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Look at those lips.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Don't crack a smile.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Go ahead, child.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
And get your shushin' on.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)

Get your shushin' on.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
[6X]

Get your shushin' on.

I'm bringing shushin' back.
These little patrons don't know how to act.
Some peace and quiet are the things we lack.
Cause you're acting up, you better shut it fast.

Take it to the foyer.

[Bridge]

[Chorus]

Get ready! [3X]

I'm bringing shushin' back.
Hey little patrons, watch while I attack.
If that's your cell, you better watch your back.
Cause you'll get a shush from me, and that's a fact.

Take it to the foyer.

[Chorus]

Get ready!

{record scratch, music stops}

SHHHHHHHHHHH!

Get ready!

{record scratch, music back for end of song}

Men of Mortuaries

Inspired, I suspect, by the daring librarians of Waupaca, a bunch of morticians have put together a "Men of Mortuaries" beefcake calendar to benefit breast cancer patients.

http://www.menofmortuaries.com/

I was kind of hoping they'd all be wearing top hats and leaning on the hoods of hearses, but the calendar appears to depict these hunky shirtless morticians engaged in their favorite non-death related pursuits.

The whole thing is actually far less creepy than that Italian coffin-maker's site that uses Eurotrash bikini models to advertise its products. You may remember this as being a well-known "weird thing on the Web" site a couple of years back. I see the (probably not safe for work) page is still up at:

http://www.cofanifunebri.com/product.htm

It seems only the "Fashion line coffins" get to have bikini models in their photos. I see from the page that this site now also offers a calendar of its coffin girls. I have to say, I think the Waupaca librarians were more appealing. Miss October here looks suspiciously like Ozzy Osbourne.

PS: The rejection counter moved up from 55 to 56 because of me. The University of Illinois at Chicago has apparently decided to close their search without hiring anyone. And it only took them five months to let me know!

Another one!?

Once again, our favorite family has grown!
17. I am speechless.

I went to New York, and I got a job interview

Note: The two events in the title line share no causal relationship.

I am finally back from my almost absolutely fabulous trip to New York. I say "almost" because everything went swimmingly until I attempted to LEAVE the city yesterday afternoon. I think the only thing that needs to be said about this is that 24 hours passed between the time I arrived at La Guardia and the time I touched down in Madison today.

This was a very trying ordeal, and I am currently engaging in some serious M&M therapy to help me get over it.

List of famous people I saw in Times Square:

1. Paul Schaffer (crossing the street outside the Ed Sullivan Theater)
2. Eddie Vedder (probably not really him, but "a guy who looked like kind of like Eddie Vedder" isn't very exciting)
3. THE NAKED COWBOY!

Then about 30 minutes after I finally, finally, FINALLY got back to my apartment, I got a phone call to inform me that one of the places I applied at wants to interview me...as soon as possible! So I'll be getting back on a plane again in a couple of weeks.

I should probably stock up on M&Ms.

PS: I missed you, bitches.

Ask...and God may answer

Last night this topic was discussed by those in attendence. And, I was accused of being too professional. Please note that Nelson Mandela will be pleased at the rumor. More SPICE would sure be nice! Maybe they can start the trend of neverending farewell tours!!

Librarians: Too Sexy for Our Jobs?

In light of our collective job seeking (with a few instances of gainful employment) and interest in fashion--and other aspects of pop culture--this article seemed apropos, especially considering the librarian connection (also check out this page... need to click "next" twice to get to the librarian)

The shoe and hair suggestions at the end of the article do seem to require us to conform to old stereotypes though. Booooring!

But are the boring clothes better than getting sued? (Actually, the librarian in question seems to lack self-awareness, but it was an interesting chain of events.)