Mr. Picassohead

A fun way to spend/waste a minute or two - here's my effort:

http://www.mrpicassohead.com/canvas.html?id=40da1e1&skin=original

I am thankful for...shushing

I wrote this song a while back, and have been saving it for a special occasion like THANKSGIVING! It was inspired by my first experience shushing a patron, a girl who was yakking away very loudly on her cellphone in the middle of the main floor of the library. I had to banish her to the foyer.

I used this "The Office" music video to help me write new lyrics for the song. Please imagine me dancing just like Michael Scott as you read.

Shushin' Back

I'm bringing shushin' back.
These little patrons don't know how to act.
I heard a ringtone, what's behind your back?
And none of that now while you're in the stacks.

Take it to the foyer.

[Bridge]
Chatty babe,
You see these glasses?
Baby, act your age.
You better watch it if you misbehave.
Library's not where you act this way.

Take it to the foyer.

[Chorus]
Come here, girl.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Come to the stacks.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
VIP.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Just like Dewey.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Let me see what you're shushin' with.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Look at those lips.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Don't crack a smile.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
Go ahead, child.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
And get your shushin' on.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)

Get your shushin' on.
(Go ahead, get shushin' it.)
[6X]

Get your shushin' on.

I'm bringing shushin' back.
These little patrons don't know how to act.
Some peace and quiet are the things we lack.
Cause you're acting up, you better shut it fast.

Take it to the foyer.

[Bridge]

[Chorus]

Get ready! [3X]

I'm bringing shushin' back.
Hey little patrons, watch while I attack.
If that's your cell, you better watch your back.
Cause you'll get a shush from me, and that's a fact.

Take it to the foyer.

[Chorus]

Get ready!

{record scratch, music stops}

SHHHHHHHHHHH!

Get ready!

{record scratch, music back for end of song}

I knew we were good

I hope this comes to the US!

Aussie TV show, The Librarians (Especially because the TV library is apparently in a town called Middleton....)

BE sure to check out the "Literary genius quiz--I got a 6/10. The movie ones and The Very Hungry Caterpillar got me.

Why is this not being publicized?!?!?

Public Service Loan Forgiveness

Details

Loan Forgiveness Calculator

More Details

And some more

The legalese

The first decent thing that this monkey-run presidency has done for young peeps, and no trumpeting of horns? Wha...? Or is there fear that students will actually take the offer, and the lenders will scream bloody murder?

regime dress...wtf?

Don't even ask me how I got to this web catalog. Anyway, they are advertising a pretty ugly wool dress for $248 and the catalog copy reads: "What do you get when you cross a sexy librarian with disciplinarian?" And that copy, it made me mad.

Also, the website is running a ton of annoying flash. So, screw your sustainable design philosphy, Nau, you obviously hate librarians and, fyi, each of your pages takes about five billion seconds to load because of all that crappy flash.

Also, welcome back, blog!

Men of Mortuaries

Inspired, I suspect, by the daring librarians of Waupaca, a bunch of morticians have put together a "Men of Mortuaries" beefcake calendar to benefit breast cancer patients.

http://www.menofmortuaries.com/

I was kind of hoping they'd all be wearing top hats and leaning on the hoods of hearses, but the calendar appears to depict these hunky shirtless morticians engaged in their favorite non-death related pursuits.

The whole thing is actually far less creepy than that Italian coffin-maker's site that uses Eurotrash bikini models to advertise its products. You may remember this as being a well-known "weird thing on the Web" site a couple of years back. I see the (probably not safe for work) page is still up at:

http://www.cofanifunebri.com/product.htm

It seems only the "Fashion line coffins" get to have bikini models in their photos. I see from the page that this site now also offers a calendar of its coffin girls. I have to say, I think the Waupaca librarians were more appealing. Miss October here looks suspiciously like Ozzy Osbourne.

PS: The rejection counter moved up from 55 to 56 because of me. The University of Illinois at Chicago has apparently decided to close their search without hiring anyone. And it only took them five months to let me know!

Can't get enough of remixed movie trailers

Here are a few of my recent favorites, courtesy of YouTube.

Citizen Kane: Tha Remix -- I don't know if this will be as funny to people who haven't actually seen Citizen Kane, but I was literally LOL over this one. I rarely laugh over things I see on the Internet, even if they're really funny, but the scene with the dancing girls cracked me up. Thank you, film class!

Alex DeLarge's Day Off - A Clockwork Orange as an Eighties teen comedy.

Blood Labyrinth shows us how recent drama Blood Diamond would look if it had starred young Jennifer Connelly and a bunch of Muppets.

And speaking of the Muppets, House of 1000 Muppets shows us what it would look like if Rob Zombie directed a Muppet movie. I always knew there was something "off" about that Dr. Teeth...

The Nicholas Cage remake of cult horror favorite The Wicker Man wasn't too successful in theaters. Maybe it would have done better if they'd made it a comedy about beekeeping among the Amish.

Librarians r in ur resort, havin der confurinces

Check out where I get to be today for the VLA conference:

The Homestead

I went outside to look around and there was some yuppie on his cellphone telling a friend how he just finished his spa treatment and was waiting for his newly wedded wife (they were on their honeymoon) to finish hers.

Other than the vacationing yuppies and rich old people, the place is full of women wearing sensible shoes and bearded men in bow-ties.