Brilliant DIY costumes!

I am approaching the level of stress induced insanity where going to class in one of these costumes is starting to sound like a fun idea.

DUDE!

There I was on the operating table, drowsing off and saying goodbye to my pal. Just before things were going dim it occured to me that I could politely request a user account while keeping my sexual orientation consistent with the last 28 years of my life. Whew! Who said librarians weren't practical? Or male for that matter?

So, here I am! No sex change, and just as preoccupied with procrastination.


In the spirit of kicking things off, here's a wonderful distraction that never fails to cool my blood after hours of cataloging busy work.

Found Footage Fest Trailer

Clearly a job at Wendy's is better than cataloging. If only they had shown me that video before I enrolled in library school.

just like a woman

I had to do it; he is persuasive. Jamie is our latest invitee to the SLIS.P.B. Just remember, man, the P stands for Procrastination, not an anatomical part.

whoa.

Just when I think that my life is the pits (can I tell you just how much I hate, hate, hate cataloging? and issues in the classification of electronic resources? and library history? and final papers?), the Internet gods part the dark clouds of despair and send down a shiny, bright little hyperlink of joy. For some more audio fun, check out Drunk Dialed. Yes, friends, you can listen to real calls from real, drunk strangers talking about really stupid stuff, all from the comfort of your home, the SLIS computer lab, or your office cubicle. This cyber-gem is my salvation in the misery that is the last two weeks of the semester.

Dirty old men sing dirty old songs

I can't manage to link to exactly where I want to send you guys, so you'll have to bear with me and follow these instructions. Trust me, it's worth it.

First, go to The Mills Music Library Special Collections. Click on "Search the collection" and type the keyword "vulgar". This will turn up a list of 19 songs collected in the 1940s as part of a folk music preservation program. You can play RealMusic files of men then in their 70s singing the vulgar songs of their youth. And I don't mean vulgar in a quaint "I spied the ankle of a merry maid" variety, I mean songs that couldn't get played on the radio even today. Horrifying, yet hilarious.

I learned about this very special special collection thanks to my esteemed coworkers. Isn't it fun to work in a library?

you better run faster than that, fat man

Here's a link to an MSNBC transcript about Rove's continuing legal troubles and the awesomeness that is Patrick Fitzgerald's grand jury trial. "The presidential advisor is now more worried, not less, that he is going to get indicted" according to the report. Boo-ya, Turd Blossom, Boo-ya. Let's all think happy thoughts and wish on stars that Fitzmas will come sometime soon!

Silly Comics

This is how Nate gets me on the bus in the mornings for school...

TomKitten

Since we were all so fond of the Britney sculpture, here's a two-dimensional Katie Holmes version.

The Daily Blaspheme

It's oh so wrong.

More Celeb Gossip--This one gross and with links to Wisconsin

Well, I won't spoil the mystery, as it all unravels in the link quite nicely, but let's just say one of America's less than great celebs created his own happy ending to a massage at a parlor owned by a Wisconsin plumbing bigwig (hey, I never said it wasn't complicated... or really creepy and weird....)

And it has been confirmed by British officials.


http://www.typepad.com/t/trackback/4486971

I love me some celebrity gossip

Yay Mick!!

Jagger Refuses To Give Bush Hotel Room

Sir Mick Jagger has refused to give up his room in an Austrian hotel after US President George W. Bush attempted to book it for himself. The Rolling Stones frontman is paying $6,300 a night for the luxury Royal suite at the Imperial Hotel in Vienna, which he reserved just days before Bush's assistants tried to book it for a summit meeting. The president's aides have tried to persuade Jagger, who has spoken out against the war in Iraq, to give the room up - without success. A source tells British newspaper The Sun, "White House officials had wanted to reserve the suite and all the other rooms on the first floor. But Mick and the Stones had already booked every one of them. Bush's people seemed to be under the impression that they would just hand over the suites but there was no way Mick was going to do that." The Royal suite is ranked among the top 100 best hotel rooms in the world.

You have been warned

They're going around, so cover your coughs and stay away from the Hershey's.

Summer coffee availability

I thought you should all be aware of this and plan ahead for your warm weather caffine needs. From College Library's website The Open Book Cafe will close for the summer on Friday, May 12th at 4pm.

it's wyrd

I would like to bring a new link to everyone's attention. Some of our "colleagues" [read: people with whom we have Sudoku races during Cataloging and beer drinking contests after class] have found their own niche in the blogosphere. I recently swapped blog addresses with Jamie and Jesse, who were disappointed to learn that one must have a pair of ovaries (I guess one ovary or ex-ovaries would count, too) in order to become a SLIS.P.B. contributor. Jesse has decided to remain firmly within the scope of LC Subject Heading Male Librarian, while Jamie is contemplating gender/sex reassignment surgery. In the meantime, they will exclusively maintain their music blog, Wyrd Wisconsin (until the estrogen shots and voice coaching begin).

Sustainable Librarianship

Raise your hand if your day at work involved stuffing plastic cups full of potting soil behind the circ desk. Oh wait...that was me! Keepin' my library clean!

Awesome Origami

One of my friends just sent me this link. This guy's origami is totally blowing my mind.

Ice Cream Update

If you are free at 3:15 tomorrow, come meet at Ben & Jerry's to celebrate my new favorite holiday.

Mean Girls in the press

Hey folks, check out this article from the lastest issue of The Journal of Books and Wenches. Our exclusivity is famous!

First Year? Join Us for a Beef
Others not so welcome, some say

First-years at SLIS are engaging in an activity known as "Happy Hour" every Friday. But are they inviting their fellow SLISers of second year and beyond? The answer, it would appear, is no.

"Why would we invite them?" responded a first-year who wishes to remain anonymous. "We're the coolest year to ever go through SLIS. We're younger, hipper, and we are going to rock the library world!"

Some second-years suggest that the event remains exlusive to keep secret what the first-years are really doing -plotting to take over the world. "It's a front, man. I'm not kidding. They're plotting in there; they're plotting some dark stuff and you better watch out. They'll come for you next," said second-year Mel Pond.

Could there be a link to recent disappearances of SLIS faculty?

Second-year graduating student Ben Hogansen doesn't care what they're doing. "I just can't believe I'm not invited. What - they don't think I'm cool? I'm cool."

Second-year student Elsworth Rockefeller seconds this, but goes a step further. "Actually, I might be too cool for their 'Happy Hour,' so I really don't feel bad at all."

Our reporters asked SLIS professor Greg Downey, thought to have been replaced by a clone whose oratory style is remarkably like that of Professor Downey and whose only flaw is his partially formed sixth finger, what he thinks. "Looking at patterns of socialization among graduate students, you'll find - would you quit looking at my hand? That's a mole. It's just a mole."

While some second years are planning to storm the next 'Happy Hour' and demand to be included, others are content to quietly wait out the storm. "They'll invite us eventually," said second-year Molly Kliss, "just wait until kickball season next year. They'll be begging to hang out with us."

###

Naked Carpenter

I want him to build my bookshelves.

Prepare Yourselves Bitches

I have to work 'til 1:00, but after that...

Assistantships? We can't get no stinkin' assistantships!

Here's an e-mail I got last night from the TA union. Looks like we're getting screwed from all directions on this funding stuff. The General Library System (GLS) is cutting funding for all its PAs (hence, no PAs at College Library anymore, in case you were counting on one of those) because of funding shortages and the new $8,000 surcharge departments would have to pay for tuition remission--in addition to the PA's monthly stipend--and now we could be considered ineligible for ALL assistantships, simply because of the graduate program we've chosen. While SLIS is not being targeted as a "professional" program yet, this is a scary possibility. Do they not realize that the fewer the funding opportunities, the fewer the grad students who will want to come here? [Note: I've removed information that specifically identifies the university from the e-mail, just to cover my ass.] Advance apologies that this is so long, but I think it's kind of a big deal!

==================
Dear Graduate Assistant,

During the past year, a university task force has been working under the authority of [the] Chancellor to find solutions to a budget shortfall that, in the final analysis, is the result of the State Legislature's refusal to fully fund the statute that entitles graduate students to a tuition waiver if they are hired as a TA or PA at 33.3% time or above.

The Tuition Remission Task Force (TRTF) has released its recommendations for resolving the tuition remission shortfall. We are contacting you because one of the TRTF recommendations would make graduate students who are only enrolled in "professional" programs ineligible for TA, PA, and RA positions:

"Currently, professional students (i.e., students seeking professional degrees such as the J.D., S.J.D., M.D., Pharm.D., or D.V.M.) can be appointed as TAs, PAs, or RAs...We recommend a change in policy such that professional students cannot hold graduate assistantships (i.e., TA, PA, or RA appointments)" (TRTF Final Report, pg. 12).

The report is unclear on the extent of the definition of "professional" programs, but we are contacting you because you are currently (or have been recently) employed in a program that may be targeted by the TRTF plan. All indications point to [the] Chancellor approving and implementing all of the TRTF's proposals by January 2007. Such a change would not only deny grad students access to tuition waivers, but it would also exclude them from current health insurance plans, and, in the case of TA and PA positions, union protections provided under the TAA contract (no arbitrary firing, protection from harassment in the workplace, etc.). The TAA also contends that it violates the union's contract with the state and [university].

In addition to denying assistantships to grad students in professional programs, the report recommends several other measures that would seriously restrict the ability of departments to support grad students through PA and RA positions in the future. Furthermore, it is unclear that, even by imposing such cuts, the TRTF plan actually resolves the tuition remission budget shortfall in the short term. In the end, it fails to address the root cause of the shortfall - state funding cuts - in a meaningful way.

The TAA believes that if these changes are put into effect, graduate employees will bear the burden of the state's underfunding of the [university]. They will mean fewer jobs and a strong disincentive for departments to hire graduate employees for decent jobs with benefits. Effectively, the TRTF recommendations mean one thing for graduate employees: JOB LOSS. But we can still stop the plan from being implemented and demand a real solution - one that doesn't harm departments and violate the TAA contract - from [university] administrators.

What you can do to help preserve TA, PA, and RA positions:

1. Check out the TAA's summary analysis of the TRTF plan (attached) [I couldn't attach it here, but I can forward it to you if you are interested.]

2. Talk to fellow graduate students: Make sure they know about the TRTF plan and understand what it means for future jobs, tuition waivers, health insurance, etc. Encourage them to talk to friendly faculty.

3. Talk to supportive faculty in your department: Many faculty members oppose the TRTF plan. Let your faculty know what your concerns are and tell them that faculty and department chairs in other areas of campus are also opposed to this plan and are campaigning to stop it. It they are supportive, send an e-mail to the TAA office [e-mail address removed] with their contact information, and we will put them in touch with other faculty.

4. Get involved with the TAA's Committee on Affordable Public Education (CAPE): If you'd like to take a lead role in coordinating opposition to the TRTF plan, join the other TAA members who are part of CAPE. To find out more, contact the TAA office [contact info removed].

pimping my orchestra

As some of you may already know, I am in the All-University String Orchestra this semester and we have a concert this Saturday, April 22, at 4 pm in Mills Concert Hall, Humanities Building (for directions click here). This is a once in a lifetime opportunity to see me get all classical and shit with a bunch of undergrads.

Pimp My Snack

A great site for those who suffer from the proverbial munchies, or those seeking inspiration for next week's ALASC bake sale:

Pimp My Snack

Yum, fruitcake...

Keeping up with the Joneses

This is especially for you home buyers but the rest of us can have checking out the value friends' homes.
www.zillow.com

best email subject line in my inbox this week

Did you get the meat grinder in the Silent Auction?

Courtesy of the Fuggers

I was browsing through what GoFugYourself had to say about the Oscars, because I apparently had missed some stuff. This made me laugh, so I thought you would enjoy.

SHARON STONE: And lemme tell you ANOTHER THING, Leslie!

LINDSAY LOHAN: Lindsay.

SHARON STONE: That's what I SAID. Lemme tell you ANOTHER THING, LESLIE. What you NEED to DO is land a role where you show the world YOUR COOTER. But you show it in a REAL CLASSY WHITE OUTFIT. REAL classy. So there's like a....DISPARITY betweeen the COOTER and your OUTFIT. WHAT'S WRONG?

LINDSAY LOHAN: You're...just saying the word "cooter" really loud.

SHARON STONE: SORRY. Okay, SO THEN you spend the next five years dressing REALLY GOOD. Like, CLASSY and GLAMOUROUS. People are like, "sure, we all saw her cooter, but MAN, can she WORK A TURTLENECK." HEY, is that the guy with the CHICKEN SATAY?

LINDSAY LOHAN: I...don't know. Um, it's been great talking to --

SHARON STONE: SO THEN people think you're an okay actress and BEAUTIFUL and then SCORCESE puts you in a MOVIE and you get a GOLDEN GLOBE and then YOU MARRY A GUY and take a lot of TIME OFF and then your HUSBAND gets his FOOT EATEN OFF by a DRAGON at the ZOO and then you have a BRAIN SOMETHING and then more stuff happens and THEN you realize NO ONE IS HIRING YOU ANYMORE and so THEN you decide to -- WHAT'S WRONG WITH YOU?

LINDSAY LOHAN: You're just...it's...um. I'm...nothing. I really should go say hello to Meryl --

SHARON STONE: FUCK MERYL STREEP I'M TELLING YOU THINGS. So THEN you decide to make a REALLY PORNY SEQUEL to the movie where you show your cooter LIKE I MEAN REALLY PORNY and THEN you show up at the OSCARS in a dress that shows your NIPPLES and HAS UGLY PURPLE APPLIQUES OF BUTTERFLIES and you do your make-up using the FREE SAMPLES AT RITE AID with your eyes CLOSED. And then --

LINDSAY LOHAN: Oh god.

SHARON STONE: THEN you do your HAIR in a WIND TUNNEL! And then everyone WONDERS what the hell happened to you. ISN'T THAT A GREAT PLAN FOR YOUR CAREER?

LINDSAY LOHAN: [polite laughter] I really need to go now. But it's been great talking to you.

SHARON STONE: I used to be YOUNG LIKE YOU. CALL ME!

Posted by Jessica at 05:18 PM

Greek Week Kickoff: Cowboys, Cancer

From today's campus events calendar:

"Come watch Greek students begin the festivites of Greek Week 2006. The Kickoff will feature a mechanical bull followed by a forum on cervical cancer at 7 p.m. at the State Historical Society."

(Emphasis mine.)

It's nice that the fraternities and sororities take an interest in charitable causes, but doesn't this particular lineup seem a bit...odd?

I can't even make a joke here, there are just too many possibilities to choose from.

The Fins know whassup

This fantastic video clip comes to us by way of Librarian Girl. Book cart drill team, take note of the sweet dance moves:

I Wanna Love You Tender

Most adorable drop kick dog ever

So, I promised a few people photos of my mom's dog, Teddy, in his brand new COWBOY BOOTS (yes, they make such silly things for dogs, and I am the kind of sick individual who buys them) and he's one of those tolerant types who let us harass him mercilessly. There is also one of Teddy in his orange hooded jacket and one in his blue t-shirt.



Enjoy the fashion show!

I like it when people give me money for stuff

I feel guilty about using the blog to hawk my wares, but other people have encouraged me...so I'll just blame them if called on it. Ha!

This is a sampling of the earrings I've made. I have more. I carry them around with me in a little box. Just ask me and I will show them to you in person. If you gave me money for them it would make me very happy, because then I could take the money and go to the bead store and buy more beads.

I usually make people give me $5 for earrings, but I am offering all SLIS students the special low, LOW price of $2 per pair! What a deal!

All earrings are made with surgical steel earwires. If you click on the picture you can see a bigger, approximately life-sized version.

Section 215

I was thinking about how the legal system might use library records as evidence to convict a person of a crime, and as I was searching about, I came across this:

Section 215:

Section 215 allows the FISA court to order the production of business records and other items, in the context of a national security investigation, to obtain foreign intelligence information not concerning a U.S. person; or to protect against international terrorism or clandestine intelligence activities. Section 215 cannot be used to investigate ordinary crimes or domestic terrorism, and it is expressly provided that the FBI cannot conduct an investigation on a U.S. citizen solely on the basis of activities protected by the First Amendment.

Federal judges have reviewed and granted the Department’s request for a section 215 order 35 times as of March 30, 2005. To date, the provision has only been used to obtain driver’s license records, public accommodations records, apartment leasing records, credit card records, and subscriber information-such as names and addresses-for telephone numbers captured through court-authorized pen registers. The Department has not obtained a section 215 order to obtain library or bookstore records, medical records, or gun sale records.

This is from a Department of Justice release dated April 5, 2005.

Not like they have to tell us or anything, but still....

happy freaking easter

In keeping with today's animal theme...

Rats

Don't you wish there were more commercials out there that were actually funny? I'm envious of the UK and Europe for one thing because of their commercials.

Utterly Random

For all of you who love/hate/are apathetic about cats.

into the woods

I encourage all of you to sign up for the May 20-21 ALASC camping trip. Check your email for details (if you attend our library school). For inspiration, I found this lovely image of smiling, camping librarians from the 1970s on Google Images. You, too, can look like a big dork in the woods next month.

Reading as sport

Michele sent around an email about this event this morning, does anyone want to form a team? It starts at 5 PM on Friday April 28, maybe we could sign up for one of the early evening shifts, then go out for dinner? I'm going to visit my family for Easter this weekend, and I would guess some of you lovelies are doing the same. If we get organized in the next day or so we can hustle the parents for pledges!

Lemme know... and think of a fabulous team name!!

24 Hour Reading Marathon

Britney Spears visited by Child Welfare

Surprise, surprise...

Procrastinating like I mean it

I am so proud of myself! Rather than working on my newspaper project for 571, or my book repair project for Collection Mgt, or my research paper for Digital Resource Mgt, I spent the last 5 days making this beauty! (Modeled with my cat Mogwai, who is inspecting the foul, 75 cent frame I bought at St. Vinny's)

Chavs: Cultural Amusement or Bold-faced Classism?

When I was visiting my friends in England last year, all the talk was about "chavs." I was confused and curious about this phenomenon, so my friends were kind (?) enough to point out chavs and pikeys as we walked around their towns.

As I'm procrastinating this morning, I was randomly reminded of this term and wanted to find out more about it. I share the fascinating results with you here.

********
What is a chav?

The most well-known site about chavs is ChavScum, which provides decent explanation from an emphatically anti-chav perspective (as is obvious from the name of the site!) and more links about chavs than you ever knew existed (see especially the "Celebrity Chavs" link in the left-hand sidebar).

Find out if you're a chav! I'm apparently 33% chav.


Other "Reference" sources about Chavs:

The Wikipedia entry on chavs provides a bit more objective information. I'm particularly intrigued by the "Media Characterisation and Comment" section, as I am both amused and a bit horrified by the whole chav phenomenon.

UrbanDictionary.com has some interesting (read: highly elitist and negative) user-provided definitions of "chav" for your perusal.

And, finally, a slightly more academic take on the subject at WorldWideWords.org.

maybe she should skip the extracurriculars for now?

Okay, I'm all about work-life-balance and I understand that music and fitness can help one stay sane. But seriously, if my boss were completely fucking up the whole entire world? I think I'd skip a few workouts, cut back on the chamber music and concentrate on my real job.

Big Kiss!

This article was sent to me by one of my favorite francophones, and I just had to share!

Deborah, forget the gallic shrug, the bises are totally hip right now!

"WE INTERRUPT YOUR USUAL NEAR-FATAL DOSE OF MEDIOCRITY"

This site lives up to its name: The Worlds [sic] WORST Poetry! I think "Peanut Butter & Jelly" is my favorite.

(I found this by typing the following combination of words into Google: "sandwich puppy pink"--I've been up since 5 a.m., which should be sufficient explanation for that.)

I also heart the following words/phrases included in poems on the page: "whatsies," "legpit," "spleen coleslaw," "turgidly," "papyrcuts," and "run like heck."

Too many crazy fucks in the library this morning.

I came across these while looking up information for a patron today. Let's just say he was far more pleased with the images than I was.

Check out the mad skillz on this one

In case the last post was too serious, I present to you this video. All I can say is: how do you practice this stuff?

The shit is hitting the fan...

Two very interesting items about our lovely pres:

1. Bush has been implicated in intelligence leaks (not that that is a big surprise to many....)

2. A member of a Bush-supporting audience had the balls to stand up and politely criticize Bush at a speaking event in Charlotte. Here's the juicy video (well not so juicy but interesting nonetheless).

Trivia? We don't need no more stinkin' trivia!

SO I'm watching "Treasure of the Sierra Madre," and had a hankering for some "We don't need no stinking badges" info, and I found a link too good not to share.

Cyclops kitten

Meow!

Dan Savage at the Union

Does anyone want to see Dan Savage at the Union on Monday April 17th? I know how you all like to stay on top of issues such as drag queens, natural male enhancement and santorum, no not the senator, no one needs to hear about him. I am planning on getting tickets Monday, April 10th right when the box office opens at 11:30. If you want to come with to the talk, meet me there or get my your ID ahead of time and I can pick one up for you.

It's Queen, Ms. Of England if you're nasty

Last night at The Pub several of us tried to figure out if the royal family has a last name. What the hell do they need one for anyway? First name Queen, last name Of England would probably work just fine. In true lazy librarian fashion, this morning I Googled "royal family last name" and found this informative article. Enjoy!

the hammer's out, y'all

Yessssssssssss.

Happy national library workers day!

Sad I didn't get a button.

Seriously, what has the world come to?

Paris to Be Offered Mother Teresa Role

New York Times New Format

FYI: I do not like the new format on the New York Times webpage. It looks an awful lot like the new CNN format, which I also don't like.

Shameless plug

Just a friendly reminder to those of you who post to this blog that you should definitely come to the Variety Show today at 2:30. I know some of you are IN the show, and some of you actually have legitimate excuses--like WORK, but I hope (read: expect) to see the rest of your shiny, happy faces in the audience!

It's going to be awesome and weird and really funny, so forget your excuses of "I have too much homework!" and "I'm too poor!" and "I'm so sick I wish someone would just smother me with some pillows now!" Pshaw, I say! None of those excuses can compare to seeing a certain sardonic second-year perform poetry and do INTERPRETIVE DANCE, to say nothing of a crazy book cart drill team performance!

By the way, you should check out this crazy site that I found when searching for the term "pillows" on Google!

thanks for nothing, ala

So you know how the librarian job shortage crisis is a bunch of bullshit? Well, the ALA is socking it to baby librarians another way--they are checking out the feasibility of recruiting a corps of RETIRED LIBRARIANS WHO DON'T NEED JOBS to help out libraries. Fucking sweet. So, in the near future, the library job market will not only be flooded with recent library school graduates and seasoned librarians, but some positions may be filled by RETIREES WHO DON'T HAVE TO GET PAID.