Some people are just plain sick

If anyone cares to see the new stupidest artwork ever, here it is--Britney Spears, giving birth on a bear skin rug, no less. With a story on its exhibition.

Fucking Chalk!

It takes a few minutes to figure it out...

Film Festival

Unfortunately, tickets for my brother's film tonight have sold out (there's all of maybe twenty seats in the theater and I'm sure half are going to be somehow related to the cast). But they say a lot of people buy a ton of tickets and don't go to all the shows. So we will be there around 9:30 and they start selling any tickets they have at 9:45 (show starts at 10). The theater is in Vilas Hall at the corner of University and Park. I figure we can try to get tickets and whoever doesn't can just start drinking, we'd meet up at the bar twenty minutes later anyway. Call my cell if anyone needs to (262-497-3387).

who remembers ramona quimby?!

Whoa I am setting a personal record for posts in one day. But this warrants it. The ALA has declared April 12 as Drop Everything And Read Day in honor of Beverly Cleary's 90th birthday! Until I saw this website, I hadn't thought about Ramona and Beezus in, like, a lot of years. But not 90.

My first post that actually has do with library stuff...

Ok, I'm going to try and start a conversation about library issues that DOESN'T involve flying squirrels. Well, it might involve flying squirrels. Later. But I really don't intend for it to do so right now.

I tried to bring up a conversation in my *cough* advanced reference class today. One group in class read and discussed an article about bringing marketing into libraries, and if librarians were for it or against it.

I asked if there was any discussion in the article, or among the group members, about the word "marketing." Is there a problem with "outreach"?

Nope. No discussion and the rest of the class seemed mightily disinterested, too.

My confession: corporate language in the library field makes me cringe. "Customers." "Value-Added Service." I've been trying since the beginning of classes in the fall to figure out why this is. Is it my own experience with the corporate world, which appears to bring little to the table of humanity? Is it because libraries (or at least the kind I intend to work in) are not-for-profit institutions and the juxtaposition is uncomfortable? Is it because I think underlying all this is the basic assumption that if you don't deal with profit, your profession will never gain any true prestige (speaking as a true former teacher)?

Is this an extension of what pisses Deborah off when people ask, upon hearing she's a library student, if she's memorizing Dewey? Is it an extension of what pisses me off when people say, upon hearing I'm in library school, "You need a degree for that?!"

This isn't really a criticism of the corporate world (although I have some of those, too). It's more the incongruity that gets me.

I'm musing. I'd like to hear your musings.

Here's the flying squirrel to help you think:

My favorite instruction librarian

My favorite instruction librarian spent one hour, yes one entire hour ladies, telling me about his wardrobe this morning. In particular how by changing his tie, he has essentially changed the entire outfit, therefore allowing him to wear the same pants and shirt multiple days in a row. I believe I should direct him here. Andi, you who I'm talking about.

the pop gods are crazy

And to balance out my previous serious post, here is a link to the gallery hosting the monument/sculpture/tribute/right-to-life propaganda of Britney birthing Sean Preston. Bucco-bizarro. The press release doesn't even make sense. Please look at it here.

oxymoron anyone?

Sorry to get all serious but I think this is worth it. The NYtimes has been launching a bunch of new blog projects lately and one of them is called "Frontlines," written by four members of the military who are in Iraq or have recently returned from there. My favorite so far is this guy. The writing is good and the subject material is fascinating--it's about working as a "combat artist" for the Marines (hence the oxymoron post title). Props to the NYtimes for giving these folks a voice.

Indignation

I was just shushed at the SLIS library while working by a table full of uppity undergraduates. HELLO, this is a teaching library! I really want to scream in their faces.

Fresh Hot Slice

Stephen Colbert, next semester I just might have to plaster all my binders with images of your smiling face because you are fast eclipsing Jon Stewart as my #1 Information Source.

You must watch the Better Know a District "Fresh Hot Slice" clip of Stephen Colbert's interview with Brad Sherman. I can't link directly to it, but there should be a direct link from this page.

Crack!

Ever since the beginning of undergrad, this site has been one of my favorites. Send someone you love a crack cookie!

It can provide you hours (well, at least several minutes) of enjoyment, I promise.

Okay, now I really need to go do homework. Really. No, really.

The Shining: A Romantic Comedy

Shelly Duval = my hero

Old school, Sesame Street style

Since I'm up way too late for my own good and needed a good stress-relieving chuckle, I thought I'd share these links for anyone who was a fan of those aliens on Sesame Street... you know, the ones who said "yipyipyipyipyipyipyipUH-HUH." Love 'em. Yipyipyipyip!

Check out their first appearance, when they meet a telephone (and note the hilarious first comment below the video!!) or this one, when they meet a computer. The second one is much "snazzier" looking, especially with their Star Trek-like entrance, but I still prefer the original!

Brokeback Heartbreak

Okay, the Union movie theater sucks.

They don't start selling tickets until half an hour before showtime, and had ONE person to sell tickets to a line that stretched all the way back past the big study lounge. Caroline was smart and got a ticket early, but I was still standing in line half an hour after showtime.

There'd been an announcement that the start of the movie would be delayed because so many people were in line, but there was not a similar announcement when they actually did start the movie. So I was still in line twenty minutes after the movie began and didn't even find out until I got to the ticket window. Well, screw that. I've already seen Brokeback Mountain, and I'm not paying to see it again if I can't see the beginning. So I've come down to the computer station to complain instead.

But I guess that's enough bitching for now. Brokeback Mountain is showing again tomorrow at the Union at 4:30, 7, and 9:30 pm. I'm not sure if I'll go, but if anyone else wants to be sure to get in line early! Don't be a loser like me and hang out in the Skeller until five minutes before the movie is supposed to start.

Alpaca Craziness

I already mentioned this marvelous event to Katie K. & Annie (who agreed to join me if the, a-hem, circumstances are right), but I just KNOW there are more llama lovers out there! Who's in!??!

The Great Midwest Alpaca Festival

Pancake photos

I'm sure you all got the e-mail with the link to photos from the Mardi Gras Pancake Brunch. There are a ton of pics, and I was just looking through them and figured I'd post direct links to some of the ones I found featuring our lovely selves.

Deb and Annie are here, so let's get this party started!

Deb, the back of Annie's head, and what appears to be a homeless bag lady scarfing down free pancakes.

Katie's backside has joined the party, while Juba's left hand hangs out with Deb's right hand. Annie is in the center, with the mysterious homeless woman continuing to chow down at left.

Paula happy but unconscious at left, while Juba appears to be propositioning Deb's eyeballs at right.

Deb and Gabe discuss timely matters of the day.

Juba admires Paula's shoulder bag while Katie concentrates on her food.

Bag lady goes for more pancakes.

PS: Just a reminder, Brokeback Mountain at the Union at 7 pm tonight!

Feeling Indecisive? Call South Dakota.

(Thank you to HipsterPit for this.)

So hard to hate you now

Sorry if this clip has already made the rounds, but it made me feel so feisty I had to share!
http://www.devilducky.com/media/42822/

top ten dick

Here are David Letterman's top ten reasons why Cheney won't resign:

10. Trying to fix up Condi Rice with his daughter.

9. Turns out when you shoot somebody, if you're not vice president, you gotta do time.

8. Bush leaves at two every day, and then it's margaritas and Fritos.

7. Set the solitare high score on his office computer.

6. Wants to see if he can help Bush get his approval rating under 10.

5. Too hard to give up Vice Presidential Discount at D.C. area Sam Goody stores.

4. Wants to stay on the job until every country in the world hates us.

3. Extra-zappy White House defibrillators.

2. Undisclosed location has foosball and whores.

1. Why quit when things are going so well?

Spelling: Do it! Seriously.

The adult spelling bee for literacy is Wednesday March 29.
It starts with food at 5:30 and ends a couple hours later.
It is a worthwhile cause and our team is sponsored by DEMCO.
We need a couple more spellers and some cheering section.
We need your help.
We have study books.
And we took home the second place trophy last year.
(from Louise's e-mail earlier today)

Even if you aren't good in traditional spelling bees, think about it! It's a team of four people who get to write out the words and confer before having one person spell it out loud. SOOO easy!

Plus, Louise told me she'd write us notes to excuse us from class, so na na na boo boo if profs have problems with it!!

Let me know if you're in. You know you wanna!

Brokeback Mountain (seriously)

Brokeback Mountain is showing at the Union this weekend, does anyone want to go? I was thinking of catching the 7 pm show on Saturday. ($3.75 student price.)

Sorry Vegetarians!

This is so disturbing...I want a t-shirt. http://www.savetoby.com/

Meow

If you like pancakes on bunnies, you'll love Stuff on Cats!

Smallest, Coolest Apartment Contest

If you ever feel like your apartment is on the small side, check this out. I have a whole new appreciation for 600 square feet.

I love lists

David Letterman should devote an entire show to counting down The Top 1000 Most Commonly Owned Books in OCLC Member Libraries. #15 is awesome!

It can't be. The Golden Arches...

...are RUINED!

This is the photo CNN chooses to accompany a story on an Australian cyclone that may have left 7,000 people homeless.

Is this the true sign of devastation? WHERE WILL I GET MY MCGRILLER SAMMICH NOW!?!?!?

I Love This Blog

Bunnies with pancakes balanced on their heads, flying cows, Condi exercizing... words cannot express what I feel. Keep up the excellent procrastination, ladies.

Cute bunnies

Katie K's animal photo post reminded me of 2001 Web sensation and possibly the Internet's most famous rabbit, Oolong of Hokkaido, Japan.

Oolong's owner, who one suspects does not have a really active social life, loved to take pictures of his rabbit and had trained Oolong to balance things on his head. The website is almost entirely in Japanese, but clicking on the links will bring up photos of Oolong with various objects on his head. You haven't really experienced the Internet until you've seen a rabbit with pancakes on its head.

Sadly, Oolong passed away in 2003 at the age of eight. His owner has a new rabbit, Yuebing, who also has a website, with slightly more English than the original Oolong site.

And if all this doesn't sound entertaining enough for your procrastination needs, there's also the innocently intended but sometimes unfortunately worded photo captions, such as "I like licking then stroking."

Reason #4328 why I don't like to drive

I might get hit by a cow.

Get the link right you moron

Okay, maybe this will work.

http://www.madison.com/wsj/arch_features/index.php?ntid=76952

A lesson for us all

I hope we can all somehow contribute to this worthy cause during the "euphoria of spring." Goes to show that we can learn a great deal from our friends. And I'm sorry I called you a ball and chain, Matt.

Here's to the rain.

Another Year Older... Or, Just an Excuse to Drink Beer from a Boot

Hey ladies. It's my birthday next weekend, which I didn't realize was coming upon me so quickly otherwise I would have posted this a while ago. I would love for you guys to come out and help this old lady celebrate her aging processes complete with boots at the Essen Haus. I'm thinking either Thursday night (sorry arts and crafts night) or maybe this Wednesday night since everyone is already going out anyway -- just let me know what day is better. (I'd do it this weekend but family is coming in.)

Cute? Or Creepy?

For the first five seconds, this site is cute. I mean, who doesn't love puppies and other assorted cute animals? Then, it gets a little creepy:

--The picture of a very sad looking puppy in a pot on a stove with the caption "simmer until floppy." Eeeek.

--The picture with the dog suggestively looking at the camera with pearl necklaces wrapped around his ears. Weeeeird.

--A gratuitous ass shot of a hamster with the caption "the end of a long week." Huh?

Dude, check out these totally sweet tattoos with Chinese letters!

Here's a blog I really like, Hanzi Smatter. You can think of it as the counterpart to Engrish.com. A guy who's actually literate in Chinese examines tattoos, t-shirts, and other instances of commercial misuse of Chinese characters ("hanzi", or "kanji" in Japanese) in the West.

Living in Japan I saw plenty of bizarre English printed on signs and apparel, but it seems to take an American to be stupid enough to have foreign-language gibberish permanently inked onto their flesh.

One of my students in Japan told me that an American soldier she knew (there was a US military base in town) sent her a digital photo of a friend's tattoo and asked her to check the meaning. The tattoo-bearer thought it said something like "World Peace". It was actually the name of a brand of a cheap Japanese fruit-flavored kid's drink...basically the equivalent of having a tattoo that said "Kool-Aid".

Straight Boys

Hey ladies,
On March 31st my brother's film is playing at the film festival. It's a short film, only about 15 min. long but it's pretty cool. And you should be able to see my left elbow as my big screen debut.
Tickets are on sale at the box office (2nd floor of Memorial Union) and they are going pretty fast. I think they are only about $4 with your student ID. Make your contribution to the arts. It starts at 10pm.

baby bush

This is really disturbing...Dubya's nephew's appearance on the Today show. I don't know if it's a flashback to college-age George W. or if we are meant to flash forward 30 years and imagine a third generation of disastrous presidents, ya know what I'm sayin'?

all this fun is going to take two posts, bitches

Again, it's a term of endearment.

This is two posts because I can't for the life of me make Picasa upload more than 4 photos at a time to Blogger. WTF? And Picasa doesn't transfer my edits to the regular photo files on my computer...so if I want to post more than a couple of pretty pictures I have to do it in multiple posts. I apologize on behalf of Google (Google thinks it's so awesome but this post proves its limitations. Boo-ya Google, boo-ya).

On to Florida. The food was fantastic. We ate a lot, especially the first night after the long, exhausting, one-bag-of-pretzels plane ride nearly forced me to eat my hand. However, note the peculiar behavior of the librarian below--too enthralled with her fruity cocktail to even glance at the beautiful nachos located right in front of her.














Yeah. So despite all the talk about 'librarians gone wild,' we had an old lady vacation. We woke up, drank coffee, went to the beach, read trashy novels (except for Katrina who read her HOMEWORK), swam at the pool, had an afternoon cocktail, ate dinner, drank more cocktails, played cards. Not necessarily in that order. We even got hit on by an old dude. During one of our afternoon cocktail sessions, this guy asked us to sit with him because it would 'make his wife mad.'















For proof of our old-ladiness, here are our gin rummy scores. Check out who kicked some major ass, bitches!




















And check out the sunburn on someone else's ass:






Ow! Still, we had good times. I hope the rest of you enjoyed your road tripping, sleeping in, no homeworking, working overtime spring breaks. 

check out what you missed, bitches

I mean that affectionately. We missed you. Bitches.

Here are some photos of the condo in Florida. We made friends with some scary looking birds. This one is called Biggie.














Biggie liked the frozen hot dogs we threw at him.














I totally forgot to take photos at the beach, which is probably for the best. The internets don't need anymore photos of hot, nearly naked librarians. Instead, you can check us out chilling in the sun at the condo.

Katie doesn't look like she's enjoying the sun.

I didn't think it could be done...

but it is possible:

Man Sues Himself

Boxcar Willie

The spouse & the cats & I are unexpectedly moving to a new apartment in 2 weeks (it's a good move, just sudden!) and I need BOXES!! Any tips on where I can get some freebies?
Thanks!

Librarians + Nuns + Spelling = Sweet!

Librarians Outspell Nuns in Literacy Fundraiser

While I don't know of any nuns competing in Madison's Adult Spelling Bee for Literacy, we have the opportunity to beat out journalists, accountants, and other librarians! The SLIS team took 2nd place last year (behind the MPL librarians). I'm a big spelling nerd... who else is in??

Ooh! Extra incentive for anyone with a Wednesday night class they don't like... the Bee is on a Wednesday evening, so we'll "unfortunately" have to miss a night of class!

Gramercy Park's Accompanied Library Society

I want to work here.

this is probably fake

A friend of mine sent me this is a forward. I'm pretty sure it's not true, but it's funny.

Wisconsin Study

The National Transportation Safety Board recently divulged they had covertly funded a project with the US auto makers for the past five years, whereby the auto makers were installing black box voice recorders in four-wheel drive pickup trucks and SUV's in an effort to determine, in fatal accidents, the circumstances in the last 15 seconds before the crash.

They were surprised to find that in most of the southern Wisconsin towns the recorded last words of drivers in 61.2 percent of fatal crashes were, "Oh, Shit!" In the places like Waupaca, Wild Rose, Wautoma, Scandinavia, Iola, Stevens Point, Fremont, Amherst, Rosholt, and Manawa 89.3 percent of the final words were: "Hold my beer, I'm gonna try somethin."

Thursday (no ?)

Arts, crafts, wine & cheese night will be at 7:30pm on Thursday night chez moi. Bring your own projects to work on or I have some coloring stuff that you can put in front of you while you drink. Email me if you need directions.

Thursday?

I hereby nominate Thursday for Arts & Crafts & Wine & Cheese Night...

No Shit Sherlock

Perhaps they should have realized this last November.... aaaarrrrgggghhh

Eeek!

Just had to share this, because no one else in my house got excited--the cat just caught a frigging mouse! Inside the house! And didn't even have the sense to eat it...what a way to end the night.

Anyone up for seeing Ray Davies at the Barrymore?

I know this is bordering on last-minute, but would anyone who's still in town be interested in going to the Ray Davies show at the Barrymore on Monday night? This is his first ever tour with a band other than The Kinks. Tickets are a little pricey for the grad student budget ($37.50), but there's a slight possibility that I might be able to get some for less than face value from someone who can't go.

If anyone is up for it, just reply here to let me know.

The Hoff

Our favorite Baywatch Star is in the news. Someone should tell him that he should stick to recording internet clips.

D) None of the Above

Yup, browsing comics is a true sign of procastination.

T.W.I.N.K.I.E.S

This treat is the brainchild of a couple of computer science and engineering students at Rice University with way too much time on their hands. My favorite page is the "results in haiku" page... true Renaissance men.

Hipster Pit

In light of the recent request to return to our roots, may I present Hipster Pit. A partially well written, nonsensical blog to fill your university funded computing time.

Return of brevity

All these posts are depressing me, ladies! It's almost midnight, I just finished my Digital Resources Mgt project, I'm looking for this type of nonsense! Hooray for drunk celebrities!!

Third (and less publicized) outrage of the day

"Environmentally gentle" drilling turns rough in what is now being considered one of Alaska's biggest oil spills. Has anyone heard about it? Most likely not, since most major news outlets don't seem to be covering it in much depth (but maybe my librarian-research skillz aren't up to snuff today). Nasty business, this "oil addiction" we have.

Outrage of the day

Today deserves two outrages. Charlize's built-in-pillow dress is obviously outrage number one. Outrage number two comes our neighbor to the west, South Dakota.

And check out FairWisconsin

The petition isn't much besides that it will send you a reminder to vote in November, but it gives them important data. And then you can call the assholes and tell them what you did.

Please bombard these assholes with emails

The assholes I refer to are the members of the Wisconsin Coalition for Traditional Marriage, Inc. Their email address is info@savemarriagewi.org, or call them toll free at 866-476-9286. Be sure to use the toll free number, not the local number, because they will pay for every call you make when it is toll free.

Check out the FAQ's.

Yes, I'm sadly addicted to Pearls Before Swine

This just reminds me so much of people that I know, but also of a phrase I learned way back when called 'a two-bagger'. It's not flattering but funny in the narcoleptic puppy way.

While you're watching the oscars....

I'm at work. Luckily, it's extra entertaining tonight since I have a front-row seat to the most melodramatic lover's spat ever:

He's sitting at one of the computer terminals behind the reference desk and she comes over and says, "We're leaving."
He says, "I'm still working on this paper."
She says, "Oh my god, you've been working on it for 2 hours. What is your problem?"
He says, "It has to be 10 pages. I have 7."
She says, "Well, you should have started it earlier. Come on, I'm going."
He says, "Why are you being such a bitch? What is your problem?"
She says, "My problem!? It's not my fault you're a dickhead slacker!"
She runs out of the library.
He sighs, runs out after her.
They argue more outside, shouting loud enough that I can hear them through the two doors. Lots of f-bombs and "I can't believe you"s and "stop acting like a bitch/asshole"s.
He comes back in.
She follows him.
She says, "I can't believe you. You are the most selfish person I have ever met."
He says, "Well I'm sorry I need to do my homework. Just go home."
She says, "Fine I will. I can't believe you."
He says, "Just leave. I'm not leaving, especially when you're acting like such a psycho-bitch. God."
She says, "Asshole... fuckin asshole."
She walks past the reference desk and out the doors, glaring at him the entire time.
Then, his cell phone rings.
He answers it (hey, there's a no cell phone policy bucko...)
She screams (yes, you can hear it through the cell phone), "All of my friends were right about you! If you want us to stay together, I suggest you get your slacker ass out here right now. I'm waiting outside the library and I'm going to stay here for 2 minutes and if you don't come out here, I'm never talking to you again...."
He hangs up on her and he's still sitting at his computer terminal, working on his paper.


I heart my job. And I also heart Biblical Legos. (even if they make me feel kind of sacreligious...)

they may be the worst administration ever, but at least they're the fittest

I've read about Dubya and his fanatical exercise habits, but this one is new. NBC is featuring an interview AND VIDEO about Condoleeza Rice's fitness routines and dietary habits. That's right folks, they are losing the so-called war on terror, they instigated a civil war in Iraq, they are bankrupting America and taking away our civil liberties, but by god they are going be healthy when the apocalypse get here.



Somehow I can't imagine Madeleine Albright subjecting herself to an interview like this.

If the library is bookless, what's in it?

Monday's Talk of the Nation (oooh, Neal Conan!) about the state of the modern library. Also, check out some of the sidebar links to the right for previous shows about the library and librarians.

And I want Kee Malesky's job.

Archivists to the rescue

on gmail and its new chat feature: procrastination central

If I still spent eight to ten hours a day at a Fortune 500 company, Gmail chat would really help me stick it to the man.

T-Rex wants to make you laugh

Hey all, I'm finally on this blog, so prepare to be ENTERTAINED!

Just not, you know, by me. But I do have entertaining links!

Today's special is a totally awesome webcomic about dinosaurs:

Qwantz.com Dinosaur Comics

Dinosaurs are always cool. There's also an archive of old comics going back three years, so there's plenty to keep you amused as you while away your precious studying time.

Hello my name is crap and I'm an alcoholic

Okay, so it's probably v. uncool to recycle posts from one message board to another, but this made me laugh, so sue me.

The title of this thread was:
Ever wonder how your life would be different with a name like "Crap?" and it included a link to this name interpretation site.

Interestingly enough, if you actually type "crap" into the name field, you get a very detailed analysis of how your life would, indeed, be very different.
Although the name Crap creates the urge to be creative and original, we emphasize that it causes procrastination, lack of confidence, and the inability to realize your goals and ambitions.

My other faves?
Your name of Vulva has given you a capable patient, responsible nature with a talent for accounting, computers, and similar fields. You plan ahead giving careful consideration to detail. Your home and family are important to you. You have the ability to be an excellent homemaker and mother, or a teacher, as you appreciate people and know how to make them feel at ease, but you are inclined to worry over your responsibilities. You enjoy a daily routine and settled conditions, once you have found a comfortable niche in life.

The name of Superfly creates an extravagant, ambitious nature with the desire for financial prominence. You desire the best in life and appreciate quality in all things. This name has made you rather aggressive, shrewd, and critical and has caused you to be extremely independent. You have the analysis, vision, and promotional ability to make progress. You could achieve heights of success in business, but there is also a factor which brings many forced changes and friction with people, which in turn offsets the success you could achieve.