Sunday, July 09, 2006

everybody poops

From the Wayne Madsen Report:

[July 4, 2006 -- Even Bush's crap is classified top secret. According to our Austrian sources, Austrian newspapers are currently abuzz with special security details of George W. Bush's recent trip to Vienna. Although the heavy-handed Gestapo-like security measures meted out to Viennese home owners, business proprietors, and pedestrians by US Secret Service agents and local police before and during Bush's visit received widespread Austrian media attention, it was White House "toilet security" ("TOILSEC"), which has Austrians talking the most. The White House flew in a special portable toilet to Vienna for Bush's personal use during his visit. The Bush White House is so concerned about Bush's security, the veil of secrecy extends over the president's bodily excretions. The special port-a-john captured Bush's feces and urine and flew the waste material back to the United States in the event some enterprising foreign intelligence agency conducted a sewage pipe operation designed to trap and examine Bush's waste material. One can only wonder why the White House is taking such extraordinary security measures for the presidential poop.

In the past, similar operations were conducted against foreign leaders to determine their medical condition. However, these intelligence operations were directed against dictators in countries where even the medical conditions of the top political leaders were considered "state secrets." The Israeli Mossad conducted one such operation against Syrian President Hafez Assad when he visited Amman, Jordan in Feb. 1999 for the funeral of King Hussein. The Mossad and its Jordanian counterpart installed a special toilet in Assad's hotel room that led not to a pipe but to a specimen canister. Assad suffered from diabetes and cancer and the operation was designed to discover the actual medical condition of the ailing leader. During Soviet President Mikhail Gorbachev's visit to Washington in 1987, the CIA reportedly placed a special trap under a sewage tank to collect the Soviet leader's bodily waste for analysis. More recently, the CIA was reported to have collected waste samples from Ugandan President-dictator Yoweri Museveni's toilet when he visited Washington.

Even Bush's toilet paper was flown in from the U.S. Air Base at Ramstein, Germany. In addition, Bush's food was flown in from the United States and tested with special chemicals before he ate it. Romanian dictator Nicolae Ceausescu, who was shot by a firing squad in 1989, was the last major European leader to constantly use a food tester. The last frequent state visitor to Vienna, who always relied on a food tester, was Adolf Hitler.]

Just in case anyone's having a bad day....

This will cure any case of the grumpies. Seriously, there's even "hamster sushi" (in a good way!) about halfway down the "Pocket Pets" page.

And for the guys: "Cats 'n' Racks™"

God this sounds dirty. But it's not, I swear!

Thursday, July 06, 2006

What's wrong with our beautiful blog?

I'm only getting the two most recent posts on my screen, and the sidebar with links and our names isn't showing up at all. It's been like this from school and home, so it's not just my computer being weird.

What have you done to us, Blogger?

she's crafty, she's just my type, she's crafty

Heya knitters, the nytimes has an article on DIY, crafts and alternative careers. Sounds like a good "plan b" if the MLS doesn't work out! Perhaps I should join the next craft night and learn some real-world skillz...

Monday, July 03, 2006

Are you a rebel or a yankee?

Test your regional vocabulary.

I'm only 10% Dixie. Which means I am "as dandy a Yankee as they get!!"

Camping II

Are we still interested in camping on the 22nd of July? I checked the availability of campsights for Saturday July 22nd and it looks like there are openings at Big Foot, Blue Mound, Yellowstone and Buckhorn with regular sized campsites. If we have more than six or eight people we will need to get a group site and Yellowstone has those open on the night of the 22nd. This is the DNR's website if you want to check out the parks for yourself and get back to me.

Sunday, July 02, 2006

Random band name generator

Just click the button and get a band name! My favorite so far is "Grim Postal Dance".

Not sure why it only generates three-word names, though. How many bands really have three-word names? Seems to me that most of the rock greats had two word names.