Librarian Affirmation Generator

So in my search for dirty sayings for our pub crawl t-shirts, I cam across this librarian affirmation generator. It says pretty wacky things like:

You're a patent searching raving werewolf with an impressive collection of tweed. You are found delightful by foppish journalists asking unanswerable reference questions. Be proud of what you are...You are a Librarian!

You're a researching master astronaut with a glowing object in your trunk. You are transubstantiated by web-footed toddlers who want to borrow a dissertation from New Zealand. Be proud of what you are...You are a Librarian!

I don't know about you guys, but I often think of myself as a researching master astronaut.